What About Now
by puuurpleprincess95
Summary: Set a week after the finale.It's basically all the what ifs and questions as a result of what happened and how they are all there for each other as they try to figure out the answers. Mainly MerDer and McSexie and includes other characters
1. Chapter 1

So, this takes place a week after the finale

Mainly Mark/ Lexie and Meredith/ Derek, but will include other characters

This might interest someone. The interview with Shonda Rhimes about the finale and next season is up on Ausiello files. You should definitely take a look if you haven't already seen it.

The title is Daughtry's song What About Now. It's basically all the what ifs and questions as a result of what happened and how they are all there for each other as they try to figure out the answers.

I don't own anything.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

"You know I've been chief of this hospital for what? Four months? And now I figure out we don't get ESPN." Derek said to Mark.

"The really good games don't start until next week anyway." Mark said laughing. "So are you feeling any better?"

"Yeah, they were finally able to take me of the major pain meds, but now I have a lot of time to think." Derek said trailing off.

"And thinking sucks." Mark finished.

"Exactly." Derek said.

"So how's Meredith holding up?" Mark asked. He saw someone walk by Derek's open door and when he looked he saw that it was Lexie. He already knew that she was going to Karev's room down the hall.

"She acts like she doesn't care. But she's heartbroken and she won't talk to me about it, I mean even when she told me about it. She just said, 'Today, I found out I was pregnant, today I also had a miscarriage.' Then she didn't want to talk about it."

"She's probably just in shock. A broken heart never killed anyone, or I'd surely be dead by now." Mark said still looking at where he had seen Lexie walk by.

"You're really in love with her, aren't you?" Derek asked.

"Yeah." Mark said looking back at his friend. "But it's not up to me anymore. And besides I don't want to bug you with this."

"Okay," Derek said lingering for a second before he could tell that Mark didn't want to talk about it anymore. "So I've been thinking about trying to make the Chief's temporary reinstatement permanent."

"Why? You're a good chief. Anyone could've been in charge when this happened. Anyone would've made the same decision you did." Mark asked.

"I miss being a surgeon. That's who I am. I haven't held a scalpel in a month. The closest I've come to one was my own surgery and I was unconscious."

"Well, I'll be glad to have you back in the O.R. with me instead of Shadow Shepherd."

"Mark-" Derek said before being cut off by Mark's pager.

"I gotta go. Incoming multicar pile-up." Mark said standing up.

"Take me with you. I'm bored." Derek said pouting.

"Watch a soap or something, McDreamy." Mark said laughing and teasing him with his nickname.

"Bye McSteamy!" Derek retorted and threw his pillow at Mark.

Mark flashed him a smirk as Bailey walked in.

"You, out. You, stop throwing things." She said looking at Derek as Mark quickly left.

"I need to check your vitals really quick." She said walking over. As she took his vitals and fussed at him for touching things he was glad that having Charles Percy die in her arms had not affected her too much.

………….

"What do you have?" The Chief asked the paramedic of the first ambulance as he, Christina, Lexie, Mark, Owen, and Mark made their way over, while Jackson, April, Bailey, Teddy, Callie, Arizona and several other doctors stood waiting for the rest of the ambulances.

"Bill and Amanda Jones and their five-month-old daughter, Hailey. The mom died in the ambulance about ten minutes ago and the father and daughter are in critical condition. He has a deep puncture wound in his heart and it looks as though his lungs and one of his legs have been crushed. The baby's seatbelt was cut by the shattered glass and she fell to the floor. She most likely has brain damage and some internal bleeding in addition to the broken arm." The paramedic said quickly as he took the two gurney's out.

"How many more ambulances are coming?" The Chief asked.

"Six." The paramedic replied. "There might be more."

"Okay. Altman, Torres, Grey, and Yang take the man and get someone to move the woman's body to the morgue . Robbins and little Grey, page Nelson and take the little girl. After you get an MRI and CAT scan send them up to Shepherd. Everyone else stay down here and wait. After I've determined the extent of the other traumas, I'll assign the rest of you. Some of you may be on more than one case at a time, so you need to stay focused and under no circumstances let it get personal." He said. After he spoke, Teddy, Christina, Meredith, Arizona, and Lexie quickly went off.

As Mr. Jones was carted off, he said, "My daughter, my daughter."

"Sir, your daughter's in good hands. She's with the other doctors." Meredith said reassuringly.

He started to say something else, but then started to make a choking noise.

"His lungs are filling with blood! We have to hurry!" Teddy said.

…………………..

"Dr. Robbins, something's wrong." Lexie observed as she and Arizona took the little girl's gurney across the E.R.

"What do you mean?"

"Hailey. She isn't crying. Her mouth is wide open and her face is all scrunched up, but she isn't crying."

"Let me see." Arizona said stopping the gurney. "Shit." She said under her breath.

"What's wrong?" Lexie asked.

"Her voice box. It's been crushed. Go get Dr. Sloan."

….

Lexie ran back outside. As she did she passed April and Bailey who were taking a husband and wife who had been impaled on a pole together and an intern who was bringing an old woman with a broken arm by in a wheelchair to have it X-rayed.

She quickly got out of the way at the doors when Jackson and Owen ran past with a trauma.

The remaining doctors will still waiting for the two remaining ambulances.

"Dr. Sloan!" She said as she got outside.

"Yeah?" He asked noticing her flushed and worried face.

"Hailey, the little girl, has a crushed voice box."

"Okay, let's go." Mark said.

After they went back into the ER, Lexie tripped over some supplies that have been left on the floor.

"Are you okay?" Mark asked crouching down beside where she had fallen.

"I'm fine." She said embarrassed. "I'm just clumsy."

"You are pretty clumsy." Mark said.

"Am not!" She said hitting his arm.

They laughed together and they both looked into each other's eyes.

"Mark, about earlier-" Lexie said before being cut off by a scream.

"I WANT MY DADDY AND MOMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYY!" A little girl with red pigtails yelled at a paramedic who had taken her to the nurse's station.

Mark helped Lexie up and they walked over.

"Is there a problem over here?" Mark asked.

"I found her at the scene. She won't tell me her name and her we couldn't find her parents."

"Okay, we'll handle it." Mark said.

"Hi, sweetheart. My name's Lexie. Can you tell me yours?" Lexie said crouching down by the little girl.

The little girl shook her head.

"How old are you?" Lexie asked.

The little girl held up three fingers.

"Three! Wow! You're a big girl! I need you to help with a big girl job; can you do that for me?"

"Yes." The little girl said softly and Lexie wiped some tears off of her face. Mark stood beside them amazed by how good Lexie was with the little girl.

"Good. Can you tell me your name?"

"Mommy said I'm not supposed to tell strangers my name."

"Your Mommy sounds very smart."

"She is! She's the most smartest, most prettiest, most bestest Mommy in the whole wide world!"

"Can you come here with me?" Lexie held her hand out to the little girl.

"Yes." The little girl said.

"Okay, come on." She said grabbing the little girl's hand. They started to walk with Mark towards the elevators.

Lexie noticed that the little girl looked scared. "Would you like it better if I carried you?"

The little girl nodded. Lexie picked her up and the little girl put her head on Lexie's shoulder.

A few minutes later they reached the elevators.

"Let me get it." Mark said reaching around Lexie.

"Thanks." She said.

The elevators doors opened and they walked in.

Mark pressed the button and then chuckled.

"What?" Lexie asked.

"She's asleep."

"She _is_ three." Lexie said. "You think she was in the car crash?"

"Probably. She came from the scene and she has a few scrapes and bruises and her left pinky looks broken."

"At least her injuries are only minor." Lexie said as she gently rubbed the little girls back.

"You know, you'll be a good mom when you're ready." Mark said after a few moments of silence.

Before Lexie could reply the doors opened.

"We better hurry. Robbins is probably POed." Mark said as they left the elevator.

…………………….

"That's amazing. No internal injuries, no brain damage. Just a broken arm." Callie said as she fixed Hailey's left arm.

"And a crushed voice box." Arizona pointed out annoyed.

"Relax, they'll be here any minute." Callie said laughing as Hailey shoved her chubby fist of her right arm in Callie's hand.

"Tiny humans have super powers." Arizona said tickling Hailey's tummy.

"Ours will be super heroes." Callie said smiling at Arizona.

"Yes, they will." Arizona said smiling back.

"Sorry, we got a bit sidetracked." Mark said as he and Lexie walked in.

"Little Grey, why do you have a tiny human in your arms?" Arizona asked.

"They found her at the scene, but they can't get her to tell them her name-" Lexie said.

"And she seems so like Lexie so she might tell her. And you might wanna check for injuries. It looks like she might have a broken pinky." Mark finished.

"Okay, you can put her on the couch." Arizona said pointing to the couch beside the bed where they were currently examining Hailey.

Lexie put the little girl on the bed and Mark stood beside her as Lexie gently shook her awake.

"Hi, sweet girl. Can you tell me your name?" Lexie asked the sleepy little girl.

"You have to say please." The little girl said.

"Princess, can you pretty please tell me your name?"

"Yes." The little girl said giggling. "My name isn't Princess. It's Michelle Grace Jones."

All of the adults flashed each other worried looks.

"Michelle. That's a pretty name. What are your parents' names?" Lexie asked.

"Bill and Amanda Jones and I gots a little sister named Hailey!"

Hailey waved her arms around at the mention of her name.

"Michelle, is this your little sister?" Arizona asked bringing Hailey over.

"Yes!" Michelle replied.

"Oh God." Lexie said quietly.

"Well, looks like someone needs a voice box." Mark said picking up Hailey and ticking her.

"I'm about to go back to Mr. Jones' surgery. Want me to tell them about the daughter?" Callie asked.

"Yeah." Arizona said squeezing Callie's hand before she left.

……….

"Okay, we're nearly done." Teddy said.

Meredith started to bounce from foot to foot.

"Are you okay?" Christina asked her.

"Yeah, my ass just hurts." She said.

"Mere…." Christina said as Teddy held back laughter.

"What? I have O negative blood and I had to get a shot in my ass because of the miscarriage because the next time I get pregnant it would've killed the baby." Meredith said focusing on surgery, but Christina knew that look. Meredith's eyes would get so dark that they looked like black holes. Meredith was crying.

"Teddy." Callie said walking in.

"There you are. I don't think you can fix the leg today. It would be too much surgery."

"Okay. I just wanted to let you know we found his daughter."

"What are you talking about? Was Hailey missing?"

"No, his other daughter. She was left at the scene. She's okay."

"Okay, thank you, Callie." Teddy said before Callie walked out.

They finished up the surgery.

"Okay, we just need to sew him up then we'll be done."

"Until we fix the leg." Christina pointed out.

"Until we fix the leg." Teddy confirmed.

Christina heard soft crying and looked up.

"Mere, are you okay?" She asked Meredith who was frantically looking around.

"This is the OR."

"What do you… Oh…" Christina said.

"Dr. Altman can I scrub out?" Meredith asked.

"Of course you can Grey." The second Teddy said this, Meredith was gone.

………………

Alex Karev sat bored in bed. He was happy. He didn't think he should be, but he was. He remembered what had happened earlier that morning.

"_I think we should stop seeing each other." Lexie said walking into his room and shutting the door._

"_What? Why?" He asked looking up._

"_We need to stop lying. I'm in love with Mark; you're in love with Izzie. You blew your chance with Izzie, you sent her away. But I didn't. Mark's offering me another chance to be with him. I mean maybe we've been through a lot. Maybe more bad than good, but…. But I'm in love with him. He's the love of my life and I'm not going to let him go." She said._

"_I'm not still in love with Izzie." Alex said indignantly._

"_Yes, you are. When you were dying, it was her you wanted. You love her."_

"_Friends?" Alex asked as he offered her his hand._

"_Friends." She said shaking his hand._

_Just then her pager went off._

"_I have to go." She said walking towards the door._

"_Lexipedia!" He called after her._

"_Yeah?" She asked._

"_You are really smart."_

"_And you, Devil Spawn, are actually a decent guy."_

…………………………

"Meredith? What is it?" Derek asked as Meredith closed his door and walked towards his bed.

"I… I was in the OR today. The OR where it happened." She said.

"Come here." He said patting a spot on the bed beside him.

"Okay." She said softly as she sat down.

"Now let's move these out of the way." He said moving all of his IV wires so that Meredith could lie down beside him.

He then also lied down and Meredith out her head on his chest as he put his arms around her waist.

She sobbed into the fabric of his T-shirt as he held her.

"Shhh, it's okay. I promise." He said reassuringly as he stroked her hair.

"I'm sorry." She whispered into his chest.

"Sweetheart, it wasn't your fault. These things happen." He said kissing her neck.

He continued to hold her until she cried herself to sleep.

He then quietly sobbed for the first time in a week mourning the loss of his unborn child and his wife's undying grief.

……………………………………………………………………

Okay, I know it was really long, but I couldn't stop. But I figured a MerDer scene was a good note to end on.

Review!


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to krista27, Ninja Bagel, , haydeertz, Lourdi, krizue, jlamb13, annamason23, McSunny, polkadot-scalpels, AiLing, alice bella cullen1, 7LuckyStars, and SSDncr for the great reviews.

I know I portrayed the sisters super evil, but let's not forget McBitchy. And they're way more fun to write this way.

I don't own anything.

….

Derek woke up to the sound of Meredith's embarrassed laughter.

He opened his eyes and saw his mom and his sisters standing by his bed.

"We would've been here sooner, but this was the earliest flight we could get." Carolyn Shepherd said as she refolded the blanket that was on messily folded on the end of Derek's bed.

"You didn't have to come." Derek said sheepishly.

"Yes, we did." Nancy, Kathleen, and Amelia all said at the same time.

Just then Meredith's pager went off.

"Crap." She muttered. "I gotta go." She said and quickly kissed Derek on the cheek before leaving the room.

Nancy looked at Derek and started to open her mouth.

"Don't." Derek said looking at her.

"I wasn't." She said looking at him.

"Yes, you were." He said looking at her.

"Well, face it Derek, she isn't exactly Addison." Kathleen said sitting on the bed.

"Thank God for that." He said as he pushed her off with his foot.

"Hey! We just know what's best for you." Amelia said.

"And what would that be?" He asked.

"Addison." All three said at the same time.

"Girls! Leave your brother alone! Out!" Carolyn said coming over.

"Sometimes I hate them." Derek said as his mother sat down beside him.

"You're supposed to. They're your sisters." She said smiling and kissing his forehead.

….

"They hate me! It's awful! I mean his mom loves me, but his sisters hate me!" Meredith said as she stood beside Lexie charting.

"They'll warm up to you. I mean you hated me at first, but now you love me." Lexie said smiling.

"Yeah, I guess. Your hair looks good dyed back." Meredith said glancing at Lexie.

"Thanks. I did it last night." She replied.

"You wanna talk about it?" Meredith asked closing the chart she was currently working on.

"I think I'll be good. I just finally remembered who I am." Lexie said smiling and glancing at Mark who was currently walking down the hallway towards the elevators.

"Good luck." Meredith said smiling at her sister and squeezing her hand before walking away and joining Christina.

…

"Mark." Lexie said walking towards where he was currently talking to Callie.

He either didn't hear her or ignored her.

"Mark…." She said standing right beside him.

Still nothing.

She stood directly in front of him. He saw her eyes travel to the hair and light up. She watched a small smile spread across his face and then she leant up to kiss him.

It was the greatest kiss of both of their lives. It seemed like time stood still. It seemed like centuries before they finally pulled apart.

"I'm in love with you. Head over heels. So much it's crazy. And I can't spend another day without you." She said smiling up at him.

"You never have to." He said smiling back.

"Okay, sorry to interrupt, but you two gottta go build a little girl a voice box and I have to go build her dad a leg." Callie said glancing at her watch.

"Okay." They both said distractedly while staring into each others eyes.

"Come on…" Callie said laughing and dragging them towards the surgical floor.

….

"Did you see that, Mer?" Christina said excitedly as she and Meredith walked towards the nurse's station after Mr. Jones' surgery. "I fixed the entire arterial wall when it burst all by myself. I fixed it before Teddy even got there."

"Yes, I saw when you did it, when you started yelling about it, and the billion times you already told me." Meredith said laughing.

"I gotta go tell Owen! Bye, Mer!" Christina said walking off.

"Christina!" Meredith yelled after her.

"What?" She asked turning around with a huge smile on her face.

"Stop being bright and shiny! It isn't natural!" She yelled.

Christina stuck out her tongue at Meredith and then went to search for Owen.

She found him in the third on call room she checked.

"Hey." She said walking in. "Guess what. I fixed the entire arterial wall when it burst all by myself. Teddy wasn't in there because it was just an orthopedic procedure, but it put too much stress on his heart."

She was smiling, but when she walked over she saw that Owen was shaking and had a look on his face like those she had seen during his PTSD attacks.

"Hey, are you okay?" She asked sitting down and putting her hand on his arm.

"Today was my first surgery since I was shot and my patient died on the table. Maybe if I hadn't come back today, if I would've waited longer, maybe this guy would still be alive."

"Hey, this wasn't your fault. It was a bad trauma. He had about a 20% survival rate. You couldn't save him. Okay?"

Owen nodded, but didn't seem convinced.

"Come on." Christina said standing up.

"What?" He asked looking up at her.

"Get up." She said.

"Okay…" He said standing up.

Christina grabbed his hand and led him towards the door.

"Where are we going?" He asked.

"Where do you think?" She replied, kissing him before opening the door and pulling him down the hall.

….

"Hey, I gotta go ask Callie something really quick. I'll see you in a minute. I love you." Mark said kissing Lexie.

"I love you too. I'll be with Mer at the nurses' station on Derek's floor." She said kissing him before smiling and walking away.

"I need a favor." Mark said walking up to Calllie.

"What?" She asked.

"I need you to go by my apartment and get me the thing out of the closet." He said quietly.

"The thing?" Callie asked confused, but then got it, "Oh, you're gonna do it?" She asked excitedly.

"Shhhh." He said clapping a hand over her mouth.

"Sorry." She whispered. "Yeah, I'll go." She said hugging him. "I'm proud of you, Marcus Dylan Sloan." She whispered in his ear.

"Here's the key." He said handing it to her. "I gotta go meet Lexie. Thank you, you're the best. I really appreciate this."

"Mark, go, right now!" She said laughing.

…

"I mean seriously though she isn't right for him, at all." Amelia was saying where she and Kathleen and Nancy where standing outside of Derek's hospital room as Lexie walked towards the nurses' station. Meredith was sitting in a chair behind it just out of sight.

"What are you doing?" Lexie asked walking up.

"Lexie, be quiet!" Meredith whispered pulling her down towards the floor and pointing to Derek's sisters.

"Mer, get up, you don't need to listen to this." Lexie said, but after she spoke they caught a piece of the conversation.

"She's just a whiny, pathetic, spoiled little bitch." Nancy said.

"Don't forget slutty. She forced Addison out of that marriage with her whorish intern little self." Kathleen added.

Before Lexie could do anything, Meredith stood up and ran down the hall.

Lexie angrily stood up. "What the hell is wrong with you three?" She asked walking over.

"Excuse me?" Nancy asked. "And who are you?"

"Meredith's sister. Did you know that she was pregnant and miscarried because she thought Derek was dead and that stress and heartbreak caused her to lose her baby? Or did you know that she was willing to die to save your brother? To save me? To stop the shooter? You have no idea what it's like to stare at a gun pointed right at you when the love of your life is less than a 100 yards away!" Lexie yelled. Her face was beginning to turn red and people were beginning to stare. Mark walked towards them and heard about the last half of this.

"Lex…" Mark said walking up behind her, but she was too angry to hear him.

"So you don't get to call her whiny or pathetic or spoiled or slutty or whorish and you definitely don't get to call her a bitch!" Lexie said before storming off.

"Can you believe that? She's like a mini Meredith." Kathleen said.

"Little Grey." Mark said under his breath.

"What?" Amelia asked confused.

"She's Little Grey. Meredith's Big Grey."

"Little Grey is a little slut too." Nancy said laughing.

"LEXIE is my girlfriend and I love her, Nancy Pants." Mark said before following Lexie.

…..

Alex had to be dreaming. He had to be. That soft hand holding his was one that he thought he'd never feel again. He opened his eyes. The blonde hair. The smile. It couldn't be her.

"Iz?" He said. He held his breath as he waited for some nurse or intern or something to tell him that there was no one there.

"Hey," She said quietly.

"You're… You're really here. Why are you here?" He asked.

"The shooting was on the news last night. I called around and found out that you got shot, so here I am. Why do you not want me here? I know you said you didn't wanna see me again, but I… I thought…" She said standing up.

"No, no, no, Izzie, I want you here, I just didn't think you'd come. Not after I sent you away, not after I screwed up." He said.

"I was just waiting for a good excuse to come back. I know I sent the divorce papers, but I thought it was because you wanted me to." She said.

"Well, I signed them because I thought you wanted me to." Alex said slowly.

"I feel like an idiot." Izzie said.

"Me too." Alex said. They started laughing, but were soon met with an awkward silence.

"Alex thinks that Izzie should move back to Seattle and give them another chance." He said looking up at her.

Izzie kissed him. "Izzie agrees." She said smiling.

"I think I might be able to get you your job back." Alex said smiling at her.

"Let's not worry about that now, let's just worry about you getting better." She said smiling and pressing his hand against her face.

…..

"He pointed a gun at you?" Mark said as he followed Lexie into the stairwell.

"Yeah." She said sitting down on the stairs.

"Why didn't you tell me? I knew I should have gone instead." Mark said sitting beside her.

"No, because then you might have gotten shot and I'd never be able to forgive myself." She said putting her head on his shoulder and he put his arms around her.

"I'm glad that son of a bitch is dead. First, he shot a bunch of people that we work with. Then, he shot my best friend. Then, he pointed a gun at YOU. If those SWAT guys hadn't killed him, I'd probably kill him myself." He said as he gently stroked her hair.

"I was one of the people he was looking for. I unplugged his wife. The shooting was partly my fault." She said as she began to cry.

"Lexie," He said seriously as he pulled back and gripped her shoulders as he spoke, "It wasn't your fault. He was just a confused, grieving, lonely old man. What he did was no one's fault, but his own." He said pulling her back in his arms.

"I was scared that he'd kill me and you'd never know that I was still in love with you. That I'd die alone in a hallway while you were in a conference room saving the life of the man I had tried to replace you with. I was worried that I'd never get to say the three words that I would want my last words to be. I'd never get to tell you I love you as I took in my last breath. That, to me, was scarier than dying." She said as she gripped the fabric of his scrubs.

"I love you. I can't believe that I almost lost you, but I'm here and you're here and we're okay and that's all that matters." He said as he wiped the tears of her cheek and then gently kissed the top of her head. "We'll be okay." He said smiling.

"I know." She said smiling back at him.

….

Derek sat in his room alone. His mom had gone down to the cafeteria to get him a coffee.

He was flipping through a medical journal when Meredith burst into the room. Her face was red and she was crying, but the seemed more angry tears than sad tears.

"I hate them! I mean they could at least pretend to like me! Why are they so hung up on the idea that Addison's better for you? SHE cheated on you not me and that was a long time ago anyway. Your mom knew I was right for you. How could your sisters not know?"

"Mer, what happened?" he asked sitting up as she came to sit beside him.

"Well, I was just charting and then I heard them talking about me so I hid then Lexie came over and said I didn't need to listen to them, but then I heard them say 'She's just a whiny, pathetic, spoiled little bitch.'"

"Who said that?" Derek interrupted.

"Ummm, Nancy. Then Kathleen said, 'Don't forget slutty. She forced Addison out of that marriage with her whorish intern little self.' I mean I know I should just not care, but they're your sisters and they're supposed to like me. So what if I really am as bad as they say?"

"Meredith," He said putting his arms around her, "You're not whiny or pathetic or spoiled and definitely not a bitch, you're just dark and twisty which most of the time is actually a good thing."

"But what about what they said about Addison? Is that true too?" She asked wiping away her tears.

"No. Meredith, look at me. You never forced Addison out of anything. It was doomed from the start. Remember what I said? I was drowning and you were like coming out of fresh air. I met you, the love of my life while I was trying to escape the woman I thought was. My only regret about any of that is that I chose her instead of you, the first time. I've had a lot of time to think and I think that after I've gotten discharged we should take the post it down the city hall and get it legalized."

"Okay." She said smiling and kissing him. "I love you Derek."

"I love you more." He said smiling back and making her giggle.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks to DegrassiFan1994, polkadot-scalpels, Mc Alice Bella Grey, krista27, AGreyTwilight, Villians R HOT, and nlca'sluckygirl for the reviews.

I don't own anything.

….

"Hydrogen, helium, lithium, beryllium, boron, carbon, oxygen…" Mark said walking up behind Lexie at the nurse's station where she was currently charting.

"Mark, what are you doing?" She asked laughing as she turned around and tucked a newly dyed back strand of brunette hair behind her ear. She noticed that everyone around them had started to look.

"Fluorine, neon, sodium, magnesium, aluminum, silicone, phosphorous, sulfur. I think we both know I can't keep going. Do you remember what you said that first night? You said you respected me as a man, a surgeon, and a teacher then you told me to teach you. You were the only person who said that they respected me. I didn't even respect me. But you got me to stop that charade that everyone else had simply accepted as reality, but you saw right through it and for once I actually wanted to get rid of that charade. With you it was natural. It was hard, you were off limits, then all that sneaking around, then you broke my penis, then I finally told Derek and we got into a fight about it, but it was worth it. Then you moved in with me and everything seemed perfect, but then Sloan came and things got screwed up. We broke up. We slept with the wrong people. Things that would seem impossible to come back from, but somehow we did it. And I don't care if people don't think we belong together or think we're wrong because of our age difference or my past. It's just like you said over a year ago, 'They think that you're taking advantage of me, they think that I'm using you, but they don't know us. They think that we're ugly, but I know that we're beautiful. And we can adapt to a hostile environment.' Ever since I was a kid I never believed in happy endings and fairytales, but Alexandra Caroline Grey," he said getting down to one knee and pulling out a gorgeous engagement ring, "You made me believe in fairytales and happy endings. Lex, you are my happy ending. Will you marry me?" He asked smiling up at her.

"Yes, yes, yes, a million bazillion times yes!" She said smiling at him excitedly.

Mark quickly put the ring on her finger and then brought her to her feet and kissed her.

After they pulled away they noticed that everyone on the floor had been watching and they all starting clapping.

Lexie giggled embarrassedly.

"So, Derek proposed in an elevator and you decide to propose with an audience? Gosh, me and Mer really know how to pick guys, don't we?" She asked laughing.

"Smart ass." He said teasingly before kissing her again.

….

"My…. My wife." Mr. Jones mumbled.

"Mr. Jones?" Christina asked looking up from where she was taking his vitals.

"Oh, God." He said sitting up suddenly ad swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "Amanda and Michelle and Hailey."

"Sir, I need you to stay calm. Your daughters are fine." Christina said as she helped him lie back down.

"But… but not Amanda…." He said trailing off as his eyes filled with tears and he began to shake.

"No, sir. I'm very sorry for your loss." She said placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Was she in pain?" He asked.

"No, she was unconscious. She didn't feel any pain."

"That's… that's good. Can I… Can I see my daughters soon?" He asked.

"Yes, sir. I'll page someone to bring them down."

"I didn't mean to leave her, Michelle. It's just everything happened so fast and when I looked around she was gone." He said wiping away the tears that had started to run down his face.

Christina just stood there watching him sob and anxiously watch the door.

…..

"Hey, Michelle." Arizona said bending down next to where Michelle was sleeping.

"Can I see my Mommy and Daddy now?" Michelle asked sitting up.

"Your Daddy's waiting for you downstairs." Arizona said. As Callie picked up Hailey she felt her heart break for the little girls.

"What about Mommy?" The little girl asked as Arizona helped her put her shoes on.

"Umm, it's just your daddy." Arizona said.

"Okay!" Michelle said happily jumping off the couch and grabbing Arizona's hand.

…

"I need you to make a speech." Richard Webber said walking into Derek's room and shutting the door behind him. Derek's mother and sisters had gone to his house to settle in.

"What?" Derek asked sitting up.

"This hospital has faced a tragedy unlike anything we have ever seen before. We have lost nine staff members, not to mention the other seven that were injured. And I know that you got me reappointed and I really appreciate that, but I'm not the one who got shot and yet is still able to do consultants on patients. The hospital needs to hear it from you because you got shot in the heart and yet you're still here, still, breathing, still fighting, still alive." He said sitting in the chair beside Derek's bed.

"Okay, I'll make a speech." Derek said smiling at him.

"Thank you. Can you be ready in an hour?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'll try and come up with something. It's not like I have anything better to do." He said laughing.

"Great, thank you Derek. So, how's Meredith doing?" He asked. He had pretended he had found out about the miscarriage with everyone else, but he had found her crying outside the night it happened and she had told him everything and the part where she said that she was the closest thing he had to a daughter had stuck in his mind as he watched her deal with the sympathetic glances and all of the questions that people began to ask.

"It's hard for her. But she's starting to recover and that's all you can do, right? Just recover and hope the stitches close the wound." He said smiling.

"Yeah, you're right. You know, that's good. You might want to put that in that speech of yours." He said before standing up.

"Okay, can you hand me that notepad?" He said pointing at the notepad on top of the couch.

"Yeah. And I went ahead and got your extra set of nice clothes out of your office. There on the couch."

"Have fun saving lives." Derek called jealously after him as he left the room.

…..

"Daddy!" Michelle yelled as she let go of Arizona's hand and ran to her father's bed.

"Hi, sweetheart." He said smiling at her.

Callie walked towards them and put Hailey in her father's arms. She smiled at the family before leaving with Arizona.

….

"Hey. I heard you're supposed to be giving a speech in like half an hour." Meredith said walking into her husband's, soon to be legal husband's, room.

"Yeah, the chief wanted me to put something together, but I can't think of anything. I mean I think I know what I should say, but I can't get past the fact that we felt safe here, this was our home, I proposed here, the post-it wedding happened here." He said looking up at her as she sat down beside him.

"Oh, speaking of weddings and proposals, Mark and Lexie are engaged now." She said smiling. Her little sister had just told her the news and she was really happy for her.

"What? Mark proposed? Marcus Dylan Sloan proposed? When did this happen?" He asked surprised. He knew that Lexie had changed his friend, but this was still a shock.

"Like an hour ago. In front of like 50 people. He gave her this speech about how she made him respect himself and they were beautiful and she was his happy ending then asked her to marry him. I have to say it sounds like a close second to your proposal."

"I bet. Wow, Mark's getting married. Those two words would never have belonged in the same sentence, but there's something about Lexie that changed Mark and between you and me, I'm glad it did."

"Me too." She said laughing. "So how's your speech coming?" She asked.

He handed her the notepad and she read aloud the several sentences he hadn't scratched out. "So together we will try to recover and to honor the staff members who died as a result of a man's quest for revenge. Because at the end of the day that's all we can do, recover and hope the stitches close the wound. It's good, but this kind of sounds like an ending." She said handing it back.

"It is. I'll think of something. But can you help me get dressed? I don't think I should address the hospital in a T-shirt and sweatpants.

"Yeah." She said getting his nicer clothes off of the couch and helping him sit up.

She watched him wince as she lifted his shirt over his head.

"Derek, are you sure you're okay?" She asked anxiously as she slid off his sweatpants.

"Yeah, I'm fine, my pain pills are just starting to wear off and the shirt moved the bandage." He said as he smiled reassuringly.

"Okay, well I'll run and get you some more and then help you with your tie, okay?"

"Okay." He said kissing her before she left.

….

"So are you gonna stop grinning like an idiot soon?" Lexie asked Mark she ran into when she went to get the pain pills and now he was waiting with her at the pharmacy counter.

"Nope." He said smiling and texting Lexie.

"You guys saw each other five minutes ago and you're texting each other, not to mention the fact that you were probably in an on call room before that. Aren't you two supposed to be working?" She asked

"No, our patients are done and our shifts are practically older, she just had to check on an old patient." He said. His eyes were still glued to the screen.

"Here you go Dr. Grey." The pharmacist said handing her the pain pills.

"Thanks."

"Dr. Sloan, I know this is awkward, but we are trying to work so next time could you and Lexie Grey not make so much noise in the on call room or pick one that isn't so close?" He said before walking away.

"I rest my case." Meredith said.

"Why are you all of a sudden so critical?" He asked nervously.

"You're going to marry my little sister. Get used to it." She said smirking and walking away.

….

The hospital auditorium was packed. The seats were filled and people who had been badly injured in the shooting were sitting in the aisles in wheelchairs.

Derek was sitting in a wheelchair beside the podium in a wheelchair and he and Meredith were having a silent conversation with their eyes.

Lexie was sitting beside Meredith and Mark was on her other side. His hand was intertwined in hers and they were whispering and giggling.

Christina sat on Meredith's other side beside Owen. She was using her hand to creep his arm, which she knew helped him relax.

Bailey and the Chief sat side by side silently gazing around at the fear that remained in their colleges eyes.

Jackson and April sat side by side. They were the only people from their group of Mercy West Residents left. April's eyes were still red. Jackson supportively squeezed her shoulder.

Alex was sitting in a wheelchair in the aisle with Izzie who was standing behind him. Her hands were on his shoulders and he has taken her hands in his and had begun to stroke them.

Callie and Arizona sat together holding hands and playing side-by-side footsie while they waited.

Derek cleared his throat and everyone grew quiet.

"A week ago Gary Clarke came into this hospital with a gun and three intended targets. Me, Richard Webber, and Lexie Grey. I was the only one of the three he shot. But he shot a total of sixteen people before he died. Nine died and seven, including myself were injured. We were all scared. This man came into this hospital, which is basically our home, and rendered us helpless. He made us fear for our own lives when we normally just save other people's lives. But even though he did this terrible thing, he was a good man, I could see it in his eyes, but he was grieving and wanted revenge. We all became very aware of the reality that this kind of thing happens. We haven't been the same, I don't know if we ever will be, but we can try. So together we will try to recover and to honor the staff members who died as a result of a man's quest for revenge. Because at the end of the day that's all we can do, recover and hope the stitches close the wound."

….

So, all done! What'd you think? There will be an epilogue.


	4. Epilouge: Ten Years later!

Thanks to McSunny, Mc Alice Bella Grey, polkadot-scalpels, AiLing, and McSunny for the great reviews.

Oh, and I think I will add link of what all the kids look like to my profile.

10 years later!

I don't own anything.

….

Meredith and Derek had gotten the post-it legalized an hour after he got discharged. In the year after the miscarriage, Meredith got pregnant again, but lost the baby again. But the third time was the charm. Meredith became pregnant with their now eight-year-old son Chris. He had Derek's hair and eyes for sure. They had, of course, named him after Derek's dead father. Two years later Meredith became pregnant once again, this time with a little girl. Their daughter Hailey, who had honey blonde hair and navy blue eyes was now six. And she was completely bright and shiny instead of dark and twisty. Their youngest child was two year old Tori, short for Victoria. She had dirty blonde hair and Derek's light blue eyes. Out of all of their children she was one the one who was the most like Meredith.

Mark and Lexie had gotten married six months after Mark's proposal. Their two oldest children were the same age as Meredith and Derek's two oldest and were best friends with them, along with some of the other doctors' children, but we'll get there in a minute. Their oldest child was eight-year-old Michael. He was the spitting image of his father, from the blue eyes to the blond hair that Mark used to have when he was younger; he was even best friend's with Derek's son in addition to Alex's. There was one difference though, at this age Mark's main focus had been how many girls he could get to kiss him on the playground, Michael's main focus was the many sports that he played, and was quite good at. Their six-year-old daughter was Lila. She was very much like her mother. She had dark brown hair and chocolate brown eyes and she was shy and timid even though she had lots of friends, including her two best friends, Hailey Shepherd and Emma Hunt, and even had photographic memory. Next came their three-year-old son Daniel. He had light brown hair and big blue eyes and was about the silliest little boy you'd ever meet. Their youngest child was ten-month-old Jen, short for Jennifer. She had her mother's dark brown hair and her father's gorgeous blue eyes. She was always smiling and laughing and their friends always wanted to see her on their worst days because she could cheer anyone up.

Owen and Christina had gotten married eight years ago. In the hospital chapel. In between surgeries. In scrubs. It was a wedding that was very Christina. And despite Christina's previous feeling about children, the couple had a daughter. Six-year-old Emma. She looked like a miniature version of her mother. She was smart and was as intense about school as her mother was about surgery. And surprisingly, Christina was an excellent mother. One factor may have been that Emma had already decided she wanted to be a cardiothoracic surgeon like her mother, while all off her friend's children wanted to do different things.

Callie and Arizona had two girls. They had each had one using donor sperm from the same man. They were currently in the process of applying for adoption, where they hoped to get their next one or two children. Their oldest daughter was seven-year-old Sammie. She had been carried by Callie and looked a lot like her. She was smart and silly and thought it was hilarious when she had broken her arm and her own mother fixed it. She was best friends with Meghan Karev. Their youngest was three-year-old Cassidy. She had been carried by Arizona and had her mother's blonde curls and blue eyes and about one hundred times her bubbliness. She was best friends with Daniel Sloan; just like her other mommy had been best friend with Daniel's dad.

Alex and Izzie had gotten remarried a year after she came back. This time it was a small, intimate wedding about a month after he proposed. They had already had their fairytale wedding and wouldn't be able to out do it. Her cancer came back. They had five kids! They had agreed it was because they had to use the in vitro. Two boys and three girls. The oldest were seven-year-old twins Meghan and Matthew. Meghan was a spitting image of their mother and Matthew was a spitting image of their father, everything, personality and looks. The youngest were four-year-old triplets Brandon, Kaitlin, and Jordan. They were all a mixture of their parents' appearances and personalities. They were all very, very close.

….

"What are you two doing!" Meredith loudly asked putting Tori on her hip and walking towards the foyer where she just heard a loud crash, actually two loud crashes.

She saw her son's Spiderman suitcase and her daughter's Cinderella one lying in a heap on the floor and when she looked up she saw her two oldest children at the top of the stairs, grinning sheepishly at her.

"Hi, Mommy." Hailey said guiltily.

"Do you want to tell me why your suitcases are down here and you're up there?" She asked looking at them.

"It was her idea!" Chris yelled said pointing at his sister.

"Was not!" She yelled back pushing his finger away.

"Was too!"

"WAS NOT!"

"WAS TOO!"

"Hey!" Meredith yelled interrupting them. "We're going to Disney World. DRIVING to Disney World. No fighting or you'll be sitting in a stroller in ALL the parks like Tori and Jen."

"Mom, they're BABIES." Chris said as he and Bailey started to come down the stairs.

"I'M NOT A BABY!" Tori yelled at the top of her lungs from her mother's arms.

"I know, sweetheart, but you're too little to walk everyhere." She said smiling at her. "Now can you please bring your Dad your bags?" She said looking at her oldest children.

"Yes, Mom. Come on Hailey, grab your suitcase and follow me." Chris said.

After they walked off Tori looked at her mother seriously and said, "They silly."

"Yes, they are. Can you go tell Daddy not to put the bags in the car yet, please?"

"No bags in car." She repeated before walking off.

Meredith paused to make sure that Chris and Hailey's bright idea hadn't left any dents in the floor before going back out to the kitchen.

She was working on snacks for the car when Christina walked in.

"Mer, we are going to Disney World. DRIVING to Disney world, the happiest place on Earth. Kill me now."

"Chrsitina, how much do you love me?"

"A lot." She said stealing a grape.

"And how much do you love Emma?"

"A lot more." She replied stealing another one.

"So then you can have fun at Disney World with us. You just want the whole bag?" She asked after Christina stole another one.

"Yeah, thanks, but WHY are we driving?'

"Because it would be super expensive to fly this many people to Orlando and Derek and Mark want to stop at that aquarium in Georgia on the way there."

"Why? So we can go stare at fish?" She asked smirking.

"Well, they went there on vacation with Derek's family a long time ago and according to them it's the BEST aquarium in the world." She said over exaggerating the word best.

Christina was about to say something else when Izzie walked in.

"Mer, why is Derek taking all of the suitcases out of your car?"

"Well, I didn't know if we wanted to change around seating arrangements…" She said looking at Izzie with begging eyes.

"Fine. Hand me that paper and pen." She said laughing as she quickly stole an apple slice.

"Okay," she said beginning to write, "Do you guys wanna ride together or with your husbands?"

"Together." They said at the same time. They loved their husbands, but they didn't know if they could handle being in the car together that long.

"Okay, and Alex and I want to ride together, and Mark and Lexie, and Callie and Arizona. So…" She said beginning to organize it.

"Iz?" Meredith asked after a few minutes.

"Don't. She's in that Izzie place." Christina said teasingly.

"Funny. Okay, here's what I have: Derek and Owen take Chris, Michael, and Matthew; Callie and Arizona take Sammie and Meghan; Alex and I take Brandon, Kaitlin and Jordan; and Mark and Lexie take Cassidy, Daniel, Tori, and Jen. Sound good?' She asked looking up.

"Sounds good to me, but we should probably check with-" Before Meredith could finish Callie and Arizona walked in.

"Hey, you guys good with driving Sammie and Meghan?" Izzie asked looking down at her plan.

"Yep." Arizona said.

"Let me guess, we're waiting on Mark and Lexie?" Callie asked coming over and stealing a pretzel.

"You guys! These are snacks for children. Are you a child?" She asked looking at Callie.

"I dunno." She said while chewing.

"Funny." Meredith said smirking.

Just then Derek, Alex, and Owen walked in.

"You want me to call Mark?" Derek asked Meredith.

"Please. Is someone watching Tori?" She asked looking out the window.

"Yeah, Meghan and Sammie." He said stealing a cookie and walking away dialing his phone.

"Hey, is this good?" Izzie asked showing her plan to Alex and Owen.

"Looks great, Iz." He said smiling and taking a carrot.

"Seriously?" Meredith asked taking all of the food and walking outside.

"What'd I do?" He asked confused.

Izzie, Christina, Callie, and Arizona just laughed.

…

"Michael! Let's go!" Lexie yelled as she walked around the kitchen with Jen in her arms.

"Mommy! Look!" Daniel walked in.

"Daniel," she sighed, "Did you dress yourself?" She asked putting Jen in her bouncy seat which was luckily in the kitchen.

"Yes." He said proudly.

"Sweetheart, your shirts on backwards."

"Nuh-uh." He said.

As she bent down to fix it she heard a howl of pain.

"MOMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Lila yelled running into the room with tears streaming down her face.

"Sweetheart, what happened?" She asked picking her up and putting her on the counter. She noticed a large red mark across her daughter's wrist.

"Lila Susan Sloan, what'd you do?" She asked softly as she wet a washcloth and then handed it to her to put on her wrist then moved towards the pantry and took some supplies off of the top shelf. Their top shelf had everything on it that the hospital supply closet had in it.

"I burned myself on your straightener." She said sniffling.

"Honey, what's Mommy and Daddy's rule about the straightener?" She asked as she took off the washcloth to look at the burn.

"Don't touch it." She said crying. "I didn't mean to, I… I just wanted to try it and you were busy and I didn't want bug you and I… I'm sorry. I'm a bad girl."

"It's okay. I just need to put some cream and a bandage on it then you'll be okay. Okay, sweetie?" She asked kissing her.

As she finished she heard crying coming from the floor.

She turned and was not pleased with what she saw. "Daniel! Stop hitting your sister on the head!"

"Sorry, Mommy." He said. "I kiss it better." He said kissing her head.

"Thank you." She said. Behind her Lila jumped off the counter.

"Lex, Derek just called. He said we need to hurry up." Mark said walking in from the garage.

"I'm hurrying!" She exclaimed exhausted from the floor where she was fixing Daniel's shirt.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked coming over and kissing her on the top of her head.

"Daniel put his shirt on backwards, then Lila burned her wrist on the straightener she wasn't even supposed to be touching, so I fixed that, then I hear crying so I turn around and Daniel's hitting Jen on the head, then he stopped, then I finally fixed his shirt, and Michael still won't turn off that stupid X-Box." She said standing up before downing a sippy cup half full of apple juice that she had set on the counter earlier.

"Relax, okay? Derek said we're driving all the littlest ones, so they'll all be asleep half an hour into the trip, except Daniel and Cassidy, who you know can occupy themselves. So, we'll have like ten hours in the car together, and we could talk, or you could sleep, or we could think of something…." He said wrapping her arms around her waist.

"Okay." She said smiling and kissing him before Lila ran back into the kitchen.

"Yuck! Mommy, are we gonna go soon?" She asked.

"We're waiting on Michael." She said picking up Jen. "Can you go put Daniel in his car seat?" She asked Lila. As Lila took her brother's hand and took him outside Lexie was glad that she took the time to show Lila how to work the car seat.

"MICHAEL THATCHER SLOAN! COME DOWN RIGHT NOW OR WE WILL GO TO DISNEY WORLD WITHOUT YOU!" Mark yelled walking towards the base of the stairs.

"Coming, Dad!" He yelled as he ran down the stairs.

"Thank you, buddy." He said walking back towards the kitchen.

They finally left and met an exasperated Meredith.

…..

As they all drove to Disney World and had a great time together, they knew one thing: The stitches definitely held.


End file.
